Communication is key in any relationship. This includes talking about sex.
Just like your communication, your sex life can’t get better unless you talk about it. You have to be able to fully trust your partner in order to express your wants, needs, desires, and more, in and out of the bedroom.
Here are some guidelines to ease you into talking about sex:
One of the best ways to talk about sex is similar to how you would communicate with your partner about any other topic.
Choose your words carefully. If you’re not feeling completely satisfied with your sex life, don’t say things like, “you never touch me” or “you never want to do anything with me.” Try to change the verbiage to say something like, “Last night was so much fun. I think we should do more of that.”
Be patient with one another. If you both feel uncomfortable talking about sex, start slow. Start off by talking about your feelings towards one another and sex. Shame or discomfort may be a reflection of ideals you were raised with, but don’t agree with on a conscious level. It takes time to unlearn things you were taught were “bad” or “wrong”. Be open, honest, and patient with one another.
Another similarity between communication and sex is that it requires both partners to communicate and understand one another’s wants and needs. Be accommodating towards one another. Make sure it’s a pleasurable experience for both of you.
Keep in mind that you and your partner are two different people who each have their own wants, needs, desires, turnons, turnoffs, and more. What makes you happy may not thrill your partner and vice versa. If your partner isn’t in the mood, it doesn’t mean they’re not interested in you or no longer feel the same way. Remember: The better you communicate, the better your relationship, love life, and sex life will be.